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CHUGGERS GRANDFATHER LIFE - Blogs - Racehorse TALK

Author Topic: CHUGGERS GRANDFATHER LIFE  (Read 32384 times)

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Offline chuggers

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O.P. « 2010-Dec-30, 07:22 PM »
.


« Last Edit: 2016-Jul-12, 08:25 PM by chuggers »

Online JWesleyHarding

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« 2010-Dec-30, 07:29 PM Reply #1 »
 :censored:  that.

Where are the jokes?

Talk about false advertising!!!!!

I thought I'd be rolling in the aisles with every post.

"We want laughs"

"Whendowe want them?"

"Now"


Offline triple7

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« 2010-Dec-30, 07:43 PM Reply #2 »
The forum ratings are just about to go through the roof.  :clap2:

Good on ya Chuggers, you are a great ambassador for this forum, it's fun and positive discussion and the mateship that can evolve from it.   emthup

Little alone the "Chuggers" brand of "fun" that then gets massaged across it all.  :beer:

Offline westie

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« 2010-Dec-30, 09:00 PM Reply #3 »
Chuggs
Now you will have to learn how to post utube clips.  This one shows why you shouldn't talk to strangers   :biggrin:

[ Invalid YouTube link ]

Offline Spudda028

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« 2010-Dec-30, 09:36 PM Reply #4 »
Mate, no Mrs Chuggers imposed curfews for posting on the forum?? ie no posts allowed after 10 pm???  :whistle:

Offline chuggers

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« 2010-Dec-31, 07:37 PM Reply #5 »
Mate, no Mrs Chuggers imposed curfews for posting on the forum?? ie no posts allowed after 10 pm???  :whistle:

Hi Spud,

Nah-she is good on the posts---but the after 10pm phone calls--well--it does pisses her off---so I need to be careful.

  :biggrin:   :biggrin:   :lol:

 :beer:

Offline chuggers

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« 2010-Dec-31, 08:20 PM Reply #6 »
I have a friend who has just retired. I have a few years to go for that but believe that you have to retire to something NOT RETIRE FROM YA JOB.  Well, this fella has a wife and has millions--plus a few houses--sold his 5 bedroom house--a lovely garden--and moved 2 blocks to a unit---well--the unit--is small and ya would not want to have a disagreement with your Mrs in this place.

He then buys the biggest mother of a caravan for $60k---it has the works---but I do not see the value myself---so they want to be grey Nomads for a while. Then this was the classic------

He wants to go to a beach which has a dirt road--he says--Chuggers, how rough is the road---I say--it's dirt--stones & sand--he replies--so is it likely that stones will cause a chip on the new caravan--Yep--so when you go to NT---you will not expect any chips  ???--especialy if you go off road----the silly fck.    :biggrin:

Him & his wife will be at logger heads within 6 months--every trip they have done O/S is 5 star class.


I think they are little like the Parents in the Flockers    :biggrin:   :biggrin:

 :beer:

Offline Norton

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« 2011-Jan-01, 06:00 AM Reply #7 »
Retirement is terrific. :no1:

Offline chuggers

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« 2011-Jan-04, 08:29 PM Reply #8 »
I'm stealing this from a book I'm reading--but brings back memories how cheap I was in my late teens (but I was not earning a  lot of money) --but still wanted to entertain.

I had expected a heavy drinking of red wine so I brought 3 bottles of moderately expensive red wine wine--removed their corks so they could breathe- held tight on the Riesling and brought only one bottle.

The Riesling lasted only minutes--so I am out the back refilling it with cask (cardboard wine)--I brought this back but said to all "try the red" its very nice---but no interest in the red   :rant:--they keep drinking the white.

So, I had to go out to the refrigerator and refill the whole wine bottle with the cask wine again--the fridge was near our entertaining--the converation was light--and they could here "glug,glug,glug" from the kitchen.

Chuggers, just bring the cask in you pck--you are not fooling anyone--Jesus--if they just liked Red Wine--I would not had to go through this shite.

Sprung big time    :lol:  but they were happy times--yep they drunk the red eventually.   ())=(


Happy Days.

 :beer:


Offline el zoro

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« 2011-Jan-04, 09:57 PM Reply #9 »
 emthup  good one Chuggers hope JWH got a laugh out of that!
Keep them coming, I'm rolling downt he aisle.  :beer:

Offline westie

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« 2011-Jan-04, 10:00 PM Reply #10 »
Chuggs
I'll have to share a bottle with you

Offline chuggers

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« 2011-Jan-04, 10:28 PM Reply #11 »
   emthup    good one Chuggers hope JWH got a laugh out of that!
Keep them coming, I'm rolling downt he aisle.  :beer:


Its funny--I do not do it with wine anymore--cause the good wine drinkers are better than that---but I still fill the masterfoods squeese bottles of tomato & BBQ sause with no name brands--so I suppose I'm still a cheap prick--My Mrs said "Tell the forumites the truth"--so there I have     :lol:     :lol:  

It is a bad habit I have got      :biggrin:  

   :lol:   :beer:
« Last Edit: 2011-Jan-04, 10:43 PM by chuggers »

Offline chuggers

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« 2011-Jan-04, 10:34 PM Reply #12 »
Chuggs
I'll have to share a bottle with you


Mmmm--you/Mrs--Mrs/Me--Bro/Mrs---and watching Lionel Richie--well---it could all go down well--27/3/11.

Hello---is it me your looking for---I can see it in your eyes----


 :beer:




Offline winner

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« 2011-Jan-05, 09:55 AM Reply #13 »
Chuggers I saw a show on the ABC on the weeklend where they simply added food colouring to a white wine then took it to a wine club.

Everyone enjoyed the wine and produced tasting notes as per a red wine.


If Westie will lend you a few of his empty Grange Bottles you'll be set for your next party  emthup

Offline chuggers

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« 2011-Jan-13, 06:01 PM Reply #14 »
Lady walks into a Police Station.
"I would like to report a case of sexual assault"
"Where did it happen ?" the Sergeant asked.
"In the park down the road"

"I was walking along the footpath in the park near the trees when a man jumped out of the bushes and dragged me in there, removed my underwear then he droped his pants to his knees and had his way with me"

"Could you give me a description of him?"

"He was wearing white shoes,long white trousers, a white shirt and he had these two big long pads from his feet up to and over his knees, one on each leg".

"Sounds to me like he was a cricketer, most probably a batsman", said the Sarge.

"Yep, said the lady, "He was an aussie cricketer".

"Thats very observant, said Sarge, "You worked that out from his accent?"

"No", she replied. "I worked it out because he wasn't in for very long".

 :beer:
« Last Edit: 2011-Jan-13, 09:21 PM by chuggers »

Offline Thesmartman

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« 2011-Jan-13, 09:02 PM Reply #15 »
  emthup

Offline chuggers

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« 2011-Jan-13, 09:34 PM Reply #16 »
Q. What is the height of Optimism ?
A. An aussie batsman putting on sun screen

Q. What is the main function of the Australian Coach?
A. To transport the team from the hotel to the ground.

Q. Who has the easiest job in the Australian Squad ?
A. The guy who removes the red ball marks from the bats

Q. What do Aussie batsman and drug addicts have in common ?
A. Both spend most of the time wondering where their next score will come from.

Q. Wha did the spectator miss when he went to the toilet?
A. The entire Australian Innings.

Q.What is the Aussie verion of LBW?
A. Lost, Beaten,Walloped

Q. What do you call a Aussie who can hold a catch ?
A . A Fisherman

Q. Why can no one drink wine in Australia at the moment ?
A. They don't have any openers

Q.What is the difference between Cinderella and the Aussies ?
A. Cinderella knew when to leave the ball

   :biggrin:  

Offline richo

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« 2011-Jan-13, 09:39 PM Reply #17 »
so your not a real aussie chuggers ?

Offline chuggers

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« 2011-Jan-13, 09:51 PM Reply #18 »
so your not a real aussie chuggers ?

Hi Richo,

I really expected  this question cause the jokes are from a pommie's perspective--I'm as aussie as they come--people who I have met from the forum should agree--just like I said on the public cricket thread----most aussies expect the piss to be taken out of them when they are down--I was kind--I left out the Ricky Pointing jokes--plently of them--but thats the kind of good guy I am.

 :beer:

Offline richo

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« 2011-Jan-13, 10:05 PM Reply #19 »
chuggers they are only funny when they're not true  :tears:

Offline chuggers

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« 2011-Feb-07, 07:05 PM Reply #20 »
I am passing this onto forumites cause it definately works and we all  could probably use more calm in our lives. My guru said this morning said the way to achieve inner peace is to finish things that you have started.

So i looked around my house on things I have started and hadn't finished so I managed to find a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of chardonnay, a bodle of Baileys, pockage of Prungles, the mainder of bot Prozic and the res of  my scriptins, the res of the chesescke an a bix of chok how bludy fablus I feel rite now. Plaese sned dhis orn to dem fee in ned ov iennr pisss. An telum, u flipn luvem. !!:x

 :drinks:


Offline sobig

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« 2011-Feb-07, 07:15 PM Reply #21 »
  emthup   emthup

Offline vadim

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« 2011-Feb-07, 07:26 PM Reply #22 »
olve it  :biggrin:

Offline monologue

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« 2011-Feb-07, 07:32 PM Reply #23 »
Just chuggers being himself :beer:

Offline chuggers

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« 2011-Feb-07, 09:57 PM Reply #24 »
Just chuggers being himself :beer:

Mono--during the day --No No

During the night----almost right.


 :beer:


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